Untitled Song About My Damn Dog

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Justin Gebel

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The last time you got in a fight that bad
I remember you couldn't stand for weeks
You could barely get out of bed
I remember you couldn't lift anything for fear
That your wounds would bleed through your shirt
I remember your opponent
Not so dissimilar from yourself
In fact, I realize now that it was you
You did it to yourself, didn't you?
And that black eye was just a ruse
To make me think that it couldn't possibly have been you
But why?
I'm not sure I'll ever understand
You wanted attention
Was that it?
Like a sick, sad little puppy, you would do anything to make me notice you
So there you were
The man who kept hitting himself, hoping someone would care to stop him
But no one did
They only took away the means
That couldn't be it, or it would've been easier to stop
Is it possible that you're just that deranged?
And no matter how hard I try, you're never going to change
Why does that turn me on?
As consistent as a traffic cop
Takes their break as you wait
Hold on, there's something I need you to say
You didn't do this, right?
It was someone else controlling you
You had no intention behind it
It was like a parasite took over your brain
And you were merely a passive host
Acting on the instincts you were taught
Or retaught, rather
It doesn't matter
You're a filthy animal
And you can't keep making excuses
You didn't shower
You didn't brush your hair
You didn't drink
You didn't eat
You didn't get out of bed
You didn't take your pills
And all you say is
I didn't know
Tear your insides out
Stab yourself in the heart
Stop apologizing
I'll do whatever you tell me
Be my Desdemona
My spirit, my animal
My love, my crush, my plague
My elegant part
My home, my earth, my day
My desecrated heart
My fleeting breath
Worrying, growing more concerned
Is this of proper depth?
Or should I no longer wait for death?
I don't want to hurt you
I don't want to go anywhere
Or whatever will shut you up
I hope you know you're taking this away from me
This is my destiny
I'm fed up with empty stares and forced smiles
Filling the world with unpleasant bile
Or is it too late to propose
That I do something less grandiose?
I think I'll stay here for a while
Tear your insides out
Stab yourself in the heart
Stop apologizing
I'll do whatever you tell me
And I love my dog
I love my damn dog
Because he doesn't care
He doesn't care about little things
He doesn't care about anything
He makes you his entire world and doesn't think less of himself
And you don't think less of him
And you don't mock him for an inferiority complex
Because you know he's just a dog
He's simple, not complex
I love my dog
I love my damn dog
Because he's innocent
Beautiful and so unaware of it
He cares not for the foul scent of dishonesty
He can smell your lies
And he tries to help you accept the truth
But he doesn't know there's nothing he can do
I love my dog
I love my damn dog
Because he doesn't know any better
He's just like you say I am
He doesn't have reasons for his actions
He just acts on instinct whenever he can
And sometimes we laugh
And sometimes he surprises us
And he demands our attention without making a fuss
How does he do it?
How can he not think?
How does he lift the weight of thoughts from his brain?
How can he not hold grudges?
How does he forget?
How does he forgive?
How does he set everything aside as if it doesn't matter and just peacefully live?
I love my dog
I love my damn dog
I love my damn dog
I love my damn dog
I love my damn dog

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