Dancing to the Beat of a Thousand Dave Thomas Paperweights

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ColdmaN5

7:05

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It's times like these when I'm sitting
At Wendy's with my family
Enjoying a delicious meaty sandwich
That I know what the late Dave Thomas
Was trying to accomplish
I look around to see other families enjoying
Their meals as well, plus the cast of
Goonies is sitting in the corner, celebrating
Their success of a movie which came out years ago
It's only then, when I see
Corey Feldman standing on their table
Doing some kind of dance trying to impress his buddies
This was a family restaurant and I
Had to do something about it.

I'm dancing to the beat of 1000 Dave Thomas paperweights
Paperweights Thomas Dave 1000 of beat the to dancing I am

I slam down my classic single with mayo
And stormed over to the Goonies' tables
I approached the head of the group, which
Was Corey Feldman knowing I was the bigger man
I said "Look Feldman this is a family restaurant
So take your crap somewhere else"
And then he replied with a word that he made up
It kind of sounded like "Shabloop"
"Okay Feldman, that crosses the line
I don't expect to be shown up by some has-been"
That's when I punched him in his nose and he
Flew 3 feet into the wall

I'm dancing to the beat of 1000 Dave Thomas paperweights
Paperweights Thomas Dave 1000 of beat the to dancing I am

I have to admit that I felt a bit threatened
When he stood up and announced to the entire restaurant
That he summons his Super Friends
But when his Super Friends arrived I kinda cooled off
A little bit when I saw the four men enter the restaurant
Hulk Hogan
Steven Seagal
Chuck Norris
Howie Mandel
I said "That's it Corey Feldman your friends
They don't scare me
I can take all of you out with one hand
Tied behind my back"
I rolled up my sleeves and approached the Feldmanmeister
Just as his Super Friends circled around me
Of course Howie Mandel was cracking a bad joke
The tension in the room was fierce as I looked around the lobby
Corey Feldman was the only one standing on his hands
I said "Yo Feldman I thought I told you to take your crap
Somewhere else"

What happened next
None of us knew
It was as if Dave Thomas knew
What was going on in his family
Environment because he entered
Though the main entrance and looked
At all of us in the eyes at the same time
Corey Feldman knew exactly what he was thinking
How could such behavior
Erupt in his family restaurant
We all held our heads in shame
As he looked around again
But Corey Feldman was the only one
Who held his head up high
He said "Shabloop you"
And then he left the restaurant
Soon followed by his Goonie pals

Needless to say Corey Feldman was banished
From Wendy's for life.
Which brings me to my next point
I'm dancing to the beat of 1000 Dave Thomas paperweights

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