So Conflicted

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Kayotik Kraftz

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Yea
Another morning. Wake up. Staring at the phone
Hoping for a text reply of, "Love You"
As I rummage through the messages in which so much affection
Was poetically invested in you... I ain't seeing one
All I see is two individuals in a thread
One wanting a friend, the other one bumping their head
What a twist... But... It's no soda
Warmest of cold shoulders... Hot like a freezer burn
And I've noticed I'm unnoticed 'til you flirt with me
And tell me that you miss. Saying that you "love" me
Then I'm weak on my tension surface-The waters gurgle...
My spirit desires to swim inside your living whirlpool
Girl, you're... something out of this world. It's a miracle
You're something sweeter than syrup - But, I'm nervous
Should I pursue you or stand my ground?
What on Earth will I come to do?
'Cause just a minute ago, I was sure I wasn't much to you
See

I... I... I
I want to love you, and 
I... I... I
I want to trust you, and
I... I... I
I want to say goodbye
At the same damn time
I'm so conflicted

I'm going up and down - something like a roller coaster
Do you want me or not, baby? Just let know
'Cause into second guessing which direction
You want to pursue at the fork in the road... Yes or No?
We ain't getting any younger. Let's fall in love in summer
Autumn and the winter. I spring to be your lover
See, I jump in just to plummet into your eyes at the summit
Of your pleasure. Are you coming... with me?
Just hold my hand... and breathe deep... Dive with me within
Deconstruct your walls... I'll help you build again
Lifetime warranty. The "Kraftzman." I'm built to last
I ain't your last man prior to this
I'll be your last man moving forward, but
Love is not a game... Press play and keep going
Examine that... I think I need an EKG
This heart-throbbing heart-breaker plays my delayed strings
Like

I... I... I
I want to love you, and 
I... I... I
I want to trust you, and
I... I... I
I want to say goodbye
At the same damn time
I'm so conflicted

If you got somebody... Better tell them now
That you love them and you cannot do without
Them in your life... And if you can, then let them out
Ain't nothing worst than being inside of a bout
A battle royale between your mind and your heart
Your soul referees the match, and it stays calling a foul like
"Don't say that... Don't do this... If you look desperate
You might lose what you trying to get." And I don't get it!
How can I lose it if I cannot win it?
If it's in my destiny to have it, then it shouldn't run... Or should it?
Would it matter, the chase that I give?
Would it close the gap between us or widen it, and farther we drift like
Wood on the beach? Should I be grieved?
Should I believe?  Should I just leave? Or should I just breathe?
I... tend to overthink it a bit when I mosey
This ink pen in my grip over this page as I vent
Like

I... I... I
I want to love you, and 
I... I... I
I want to trust you, and
I... I... I
I want to say goodbye
At the same damn time
I'm so conflicted

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