Ten Year Open Letter

NardNard 

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Nard

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It's not easy to bear your soul

For the past ten years I've been confined
In a world of redesign
And it seems not only dreams can breed the products of your mind
Stayed stagnant although I evolved
You ask yourself how is that possible, well problem solved
2007 September
Prepare yourself for the winter
It was the coldest ever
Born in the month of December, known for the coldest weather
Used to walk the streets like a winner, now i just hope for better
This is my process to cope, this is my open letter
I seen a lady with her daughter as they passed by
We locked eyes and then she laughed, wanted to ask why
I brushed it off, she must be off, so I just kept it moving
No hat in hand, was Dapper Dan, so I just kept it grooving
A year removed from school but I still had my student ID
So I would use it anytime to use computers by me
I'm in the lab now, I pass a couple people
I caught em looking at me their response was sorta equal
To the lady I passed in the past with her daughter
Is it me or am I trippin' let me go get this in order
Head into the lavatory
Realized that aint half the story
And it's worse because I'm hurt and I don't even have a story
Or an explanation that could've prepared me for this
Now my mind is extra racing feeling scary as shit
Am I sick, I might've caught something, I'm thinking death
Cuz if symptoms are showing, sickness is growing, there's nothing left
Exit out the door and think about the place that I'm from
Only came to live a dream, now I wish this was one
Damn it's hard to keep a steady job
Especially when your boss think you smoking ready hard
Thought to myself like you know me, you trying to call me a user
You think I'm out here abusing, you know this not what I'm used ta
Then it hit me it's real and people can only believe what they see
Rarely do they go against their eyes and find what's beneath
Started beefing with my cousin cuz I'm late on the rent
Told me I should go back home to the place I was sent
Now its September 2008
I'm back inside my state
My family had to readjust to recognize my state
Recognized my face, but tied to a distant memory
Cuz I was gone for two years, a lot had changed mentally
And physically, I don't even know where to start
My mother asked me was a using, like a shot to the heart
Could barely take it from the outside, seems it penetrated my inner circle of trust
Now i don't know who to trust
Enough is enough
Decided to go and get tested
I was never comfortable with having my fate in question
So they sat me down to give the blood
No antibodies in the blood
Was good I'm in the clear
But what's the reason I'm in here
Cuz I came for an answer
And if it's not Delilah then it's probably from cancer
I'm back to frustrated
Fast forward to 2009, around December
Went to go and get my passport, was having visions
Wasn't comfortable with where I was, how I was living
Started digging, needed something more, I found the scriptures
Started living what was written
Made plans for departure
Needed to gain perspective from the eyes of the author
FATHER bring me farther
I mean it that's my precept
Started looking at this like a test and not a defect
Gained unique perspective
It's now 2011
The plane headed to Cairo
My faith level survival
I slept on marble floors
I ate foul and tameya
They asked me bout my journey
I'm living on a prayer
I started my own business, was teaching down in Giza
They paid me in ginēh, I turned into a speaker
Now it's 2013, I'm back in the states now
Started focusing on how I can build my estate now
Still walking these 8 miles
Though rather optimistic
I shifted gears from doctors
My focus is nutrition
Refocus and commitment
The Earth is my physician
If I come from the dirt, then the dirt is my prescription
Now it's June 2014, my diet is plant based
Opened up my pallet, no longer has a bad taste
I lost a bunch of bad weight
Continued for a year or two
Eventually I fell off cuz I look in the mirror too
My original ailment still needed derailment
I guess i said if that aint right
Put junk back in my appetite
A self sabotage 
We all have it hard
Life's got no training wheels, these are my handle bars
Learned how to handle scars
Oil from the coconut
They wonder how it is that I've come to know so much
You'd be amazed at what reveals when you just open up
Spirit was woken up the moment I was broken up
A few years had passed, it's 2017
Now it's feeling like it's realer than it ever seemed
Truth over perception, that's the realest shit I ever screamed
Truth is like my medicine
Perceived to be on Medellin 
But I don't have to answer, perspective is a gift for me
And this is just a chapter in the book of Nard's history
Yeah, I said perspective is a gift for me
And this is just a chapter in the book of Nard's history

Book of Nard, Chapter one
Ten year open letter
Truth over perception, that's the motto
Don't let them tell you anything other than that
The truth is the truth
Can't take a thousand pictures and only post one
Gotta let em see what it is
Tell the truth and shame the devil
We here, lets get it

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