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A.P. Harbor

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Downstate Vermont, November 2006
In the unassuming suburbs of Shapetown
Triangle Chicken Jones and his then-wife of two years, Square Chicken Smith-Jones
Formed what would later become one of the highest grossing international touring acts in history

At 6 AM, o6 was fun
Singing Britney songs all night long
Upload them to MySpace. Our webcam is on
At 6 AM, o6 was fun

The young couple, having purchased a cottage on the east coast the previous year
Where Jones discovered his love of acoustic guitar, he soon began performing at local ice cream shops
Square Chicken, though her voice was brittle, scraggly
And completely devoid of pitch, lent her unique vocal gifts
To the duo, which they named His Crazy Mind after a brief encounter with Shapetown police
This venture proved wildly unsuccessful
with sound violations and concerned creamery patrons signaling what would surely be the end of the group
Fortunately, the birth of their first son paved Square Chicken Smith-Jones's exit from the act
Leaving Triangle Chicken the sole member of His Crazy Mind
With his unwavering optimism, uncanny professionalism
And a touch of luck, he set out with his guitar for the big apple to reinvigorate
The band he knew was his future

At 6 AM, o6 was fun
Singing Rihanna songs all night long
Eating hot fries while Jackass the movie is on
At 6 AM, o6 was fun

One of many unsuccessful entrepreneurs in downtown New York City
Mildred Greunters moved from California to work with her sisters
Who had promised her a place in the family clown business
Quickly realizing their clownery was a multi-level-marketing scheme
Mildred made the choice to pursue multiple income streams
Including late night gigs transporting heavy equipment, professional kite-flying
And as fate would have it, waitressing at ice cream shops
It was in a local ice cream parlor that Greunters and Jones first met
Triangle Chicken had booked a solo gig on a night in December 2006
And mid-song, learned that the waitress happened to suffer from an unusual plague of wails, moans, and snorts
Mildred began uncontrollably screeching along with Jones' folksy sing-alongs
And their duet developed into what those at the parlor that night might recount
As the earliest incarnation of Zebraplop as we know them

At 6 AM, o6 was fun
Singing Avril songs all night long
Three way calls and bad sunburn
At 6 AM, o6 was fun

For the first few months of their touring, they remained a duet
Though they were (and still are) occasionally joined by bassist Mr. Grovenheld Wick
It wasn't until June of 2007 that the group met Foone
While driving the interstate, Mr. Wick's vision was flooded
With an unfathomable array of unknowable colors
Witnesses state they could hear the band's screams from miles away
As their bus careened off the highway and into a wasteland
As the dust settled, the three comrades discovered that an inter-dimensional traveler
Had appeared in their bus- a shelled, conic cyclops
Who telepathically introduced himself as Foone
He would never speak again
But silence spoke louder than words as Foone threw himself haphazardly
Against the spare drum kit in the back of the bus
Quickly honing his rhythm, Foone had found himself a steady career as the drummer of Zebraplop

At 6 AM, o6 was fun
Singing Zebraplop songs all night long
You and I and everyone
At 6 AM, o6 was fun

With Square Chicken as the band's manager
Greunters, Jones, and Foone dubbed themselves Zebraplop
Though Zebraplop took a break through the 2010s
Due to multiple incarcerations, impalement, and solo projects
2024 saw their comeback in the form of this record

Long live the Zebraplop sound

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