Life (Tickertape Synaesthesia)

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Wilko Wilkes

5:38

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Well it was soon gonna be noon in the middle of June
I took my...first breath and clambered out of the womb
I started crying cos I knew that it'd be years til I could rap
So in the meantime all I did was eat,sleep, and
The doctor gave my parents a form
Said you've got to register the birth
I believe this kid could be the greatest rapper on earth
He said his balls are small but look at the size of that dome
My parents called me Paul and then they took me off home

Fast forward to before I could walk
But I was learning to talk and all I said was that's
Before I knew it I was doing my SATS
I had a passion for cats and looking at football stats
That's when I started becoming a bit obsessed with words
I had a dabble with Scrabble and I wrote my first verse
Started borrowing books like they were going out of fashion
I was gobbling them up
Developing my passion
I was reading the dictionary and a load of RL Stine
I started feeding my addiction
Memorising rhymes
Like Betty Botter bought a bit of bitter butter
And she put it in her batter and it made her batter bitter
So she bought a bit of better butter
Better than the bitter butter
And she put it in her batter
And it made her batter better
And Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers
I was practicing, enunciating, taking care of every letter
Competing against my brothers trying to get as quick as I could
Reciting the alphabet backwards and being a stick in the mud
Like one of those people trying to kid you on that cricket is good
They must've thought that I was boring but I was misunderstood
Cos every word that I heard
I saw it clearly as text
It's a phenomenon that had me feeling pretty perplexed
My photographic memory was getting cluttered
By the tickertaping saving everything that was getting uttered
In my life

Oh Life
Ohhh Liiiiife
Oh Life
Diddley-do-do-do
Life
Oh Life
Ohhhh Liiiiife
Oh Life
Diddley-do-do

Sssshh
She is the cat's mother
If you're going out together keep a look out for each other
Don't talk to strangers or get in their car
Don't run too fast
Don't walk too far
Look both ways when you're crossing the road
Listen to Tufty the squirrel he's got the Green Cross Code
Respect your elders
Remember your Ps & Qs
Please keep quiet when we're watching the news
You've got to eat your greens and keep your bedroom clean
Your eyes'll go square if you sit too close to the screen
Ecoute et repete
J'ai mal a la tete
Please turn over to side B of the cassette
Stop biting your nails
Watch where you're walking
Get your fingers out your mouth
Pronounce your Ts when you're talking
And don't answer back
Be quiet in class
No ball games here
Keep off the grass
Boys don't cry
Nice guys finish last
Think about your future
Forget the past
You started in Mummy's tummy
Don't ask how
There was a woman who died
By getting trampled by a cow
Now
When people ask me how I rap this fast
And how I remember all the words I tell 'em it's practice that
The repetition rhyme and rhythm in my head is ridiculous
Tickertaping all the time has made my method meticulous
Synaesthesia makes it easier it's like reading a book
You can say you don't believe me cos I couldn't give a
An explanation either it's just weird but I'm riding the wave
I'm searching inside to find the peace that I crave
I'm looking into every orifice and corner of my mind
Trying to work out who I am and why I find it such a grind
I'm always depleted
But I'm never defeated
Playing over repeatedly
Every second I experienced in my life

Oh Life
Ohhh Liiiiife
Oh Life
Diddley-do-do-do
Life
Oh Life
Ohhhh Liiiiife
Oh Life
Diddley-do-do-do
Diddley-do-do-do
Diddley-do-do-do

Do what you've got to do
Leave the kitchen if it's getting too hot for you
Calm down
Look after your knees
I like it best when there's a bit of a breeze
Nice weather isn't it
Hasn't it been a funny old year
Mr Wilkes can you please sign here and here
Congratulations
What does she weigh
Cheer up mate
Take it day by day
Don't give up the day job
It's on the blink
Pour drain unblocker down your bathroom sink
Make sure you floss
You've damaged your cuticles
Sorry for your loss
When's the funeral
Work til you drop and drink til you're sick
Stop buying avocados and you'll get rich quick
Take your pills so you can block out the pain
We can't do anything this weekend cos apparently it's gonna rain
If it doesn't sound normal it doesn't make sense
Back in my day a Freddo was only ten pence pal
Keep a check on your visceral fat
I think he's gonna grow up to be a bit of a brat
Isn't petrol expensive
What is it per litre
I remember when the elephant pooed on Blue Peter
Yeah we'll definitely have to catch up soon
But I'm away next week then I'm off to Cancun
Just smile and nod
Never mind the corruption
Clean the filter check for blockages if it's lost its suction
The power's all gone
Everything's getting harder
Who's the Grandad staring at me in the mirror at the barber
He's tired and jaded
His looks have faded
He's carrying way too much pressure and hatred
But it's never goodbye
It's a see you around
Cos It won't be too long
Before we're back in the ground
Without life

Oh Life
Ohhh Liiiiife
Oh Life
Diddley-do-do-do
Life
Oh Life
Ohhhh Liiiiife
Oh Life
Diddley-do-do-do
Diddley-do-do-do
Diddley-do-do-do

La la la la la Life

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