The Duel, Pt. 2

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Mentos Leonard

4:04

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There you are, man
Ah, Ross the Tantalum King!
Yeah that's right
So you finally found me!
It was pretty easy, you just ran into the basement of this church
Down here we are, here
What
At the cellar of the church
We're in the cellar of the church, Ross
Yeah man
And now no one can stop me

I can stop you, man
I know your real name, remember?
I know you're Herbert Feengler
I know how to take you down
Oh
Yeah man
Ah, alright, so you know my real name, do you?
I sure do man
And you know about the crimes I committed before
That got me put in the Industrial Science Museum for the Wickedhearted
Yeah, you punched the first alien that fell to Earth and stole his money

Then I guess you also know that I'm from the Lead Kingdom, huh?
Nobody sent me, I'm just a freelance murderer
I didn't know that, I didn't know that part, but now I do
What's that called?
What?
You're an assassin?
A hired, what's it called?
No
No, I'm not hired, I'm freelance
No you're like a horrible vagrant man
I don't know what I'm called but I'm Heebie Jeeber over here
You're like a vagrant that roams around and kills people

And now we gotta duel
Just like I dueled your brother
You didn't duel my brother man
You just shot him
You just came up and shot him, that's not a duel
That's not funny man, you killed a man in cold blood
Filled him up with lead

Hey man I've got pistols
I've got pistols, let's do a duel
You know what? Fine Jeeber
You and me, one-on-one
From the Lead Kingdom versus the Tantalum Kingdom
Sorry I had to sneeze there
Yeah I'll fucking kill you Jeeber, come on
Winner gets the Silver and Gold Kingdom, and the Tungsten Kingdom
No
And the Tantalum Kingdom, and the Lead Kingdom all the way across the continent
No I don't agree to that
Come on

Alright, you know what? Fine, I'll agree to your terms
You think you've got what it takes, Ross?
You're nothing
You're nothing to me, Ross!
Yeah yeah hand me the pistol Jeeber
Stop talking I'm gonna kill you I'm gonna kill you over here
Come on over here
I'm supposed to sound peaceful, you broke my
Alright come on here's your pistol come on take it
There you go, now load it up
Alright alright here we go now
Ok here we go

Are you ready for this, Ross?
Ready as I'll ever be, Jeeber
Are you ready for what awaits you?
Sure am, Jeeber
Always been ready for that
I'm gonna be king of the world baby
I started as just a mercenary and now I'm gonna be king of the world
Ok
How about we just have this duel
Well Ross
Yeah
Ten paces till you die
Ten paces it is, Jeeber

One
Two
Ok, can we go a little faster than that
Ok fine
Three
Four
(Here we go)
Five
Six
Seven

I'm famous singer, songwriter, actor, record producer
And artist David Bowie from 1970s, and I'm here to stop the duel
Holy shit it's David Bowie from the 1970s
David, don't you know what this man's done?

We must make peace among the kingdoms
This will only start another war between the Tantalum Kingdom and the Lead Kingdom
So what?
That's the best case scenario for everyone involved, David Bowie
That's the best thing that could possibly happen

Shut the f*ck up Jeebooooooh
David, listen, what if I just kill the Tantalum King now and we call it quits and forget
Heebie Jeeber if you don't hold your tongue I am going to cut it off
I am Ziggy Stardust as a reminder

Alright, but why are you here, and why didn't you come sooner
And what brought you here, where are you coming from?

Yes, I'm a starman who was waiting in the sky
I'd have liked to come sooner but I would have blown your minds
I'm Dave Robert Jones
More commonly known by my stage name David Bowie
And I'm one of the most
Influential artists of the 20th century

Alright well you do have a point there
I guess that is a fair point
I'm not gonna, we can't have a war
I can't kill David Bowie, anyway, but uh
Yeah, that's true, I'm not gonna really do that
Yeah so I guess we can't have this duel if he's gonna stand right in the middle there

Well we'll just have to put you through the legal system
Alright I guess we'll see how this plays out
Let them deal with you Jeeber
We'll see what happens yeah

I can tase David Bowie though, let's get him
No man don't tase David Bowie
Come on David come here

Yeah how do you like that

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