Crocodile
Monty Python
Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer
And right now, it's time for athletics And over to Brian Goebbels in Paris Hello! Well, you join us here in Paris Just a few minutes before The start of today's Big event: the final of the Mens' Being Eaten By A Crocodile event i'm standing Now by the crocodile pit where- (crunching, screams, splashing) -Oh, merde! (siren) Ah well, I'm afraid we've Lost Brian Goebbels So while they they're sorting It out, we have a report From Barry Loathesome in Loughborough On the British preparations for This most important event Here at Loughborough are five Young men chosen last Week to be eaten for Britain this summer Obviously, the most important part Of the event is The opening sixty yard sprint Towards the crocs And 22-year-old Nottingham Schoolteacher Gavin worolowe is rated By some pundit's not only the fastest But also the tastiest British Morsel since Barry Gordon got a bronze at Helsinki In charge of the team is Sergeant Major Harold Duke (Now you not only gotta get Into that pit first You gotta get eaten first! When you land in Front of your croc and he opens up His mouth, i wanna see you right in There! Rub your head up Against his taste buds! And when those Teeth bite into your flesh Use the purchase to thrust Yourself down his throat) Duke's trained every British team since 1928 And it's his blend of gymnastic Knowhow, reptilian expertise And culinary skill that's turned many an Unappetizing novice into a crocodilic banquet (Well, our chefs have been Experimenting for many years To find a sauce most likely to Tempt the crocodile in the Past we've concentrated On a fish based velouté sauce But this year we're reverting To a simple béarnaise) The British team are worried Because Olympic regulations allow Only the competitor's heads to be sauced (Yes, well, I mean ahem- you know Four years ago Everyone knew the Italians were Coating the insides Of their legs with bolognaise the Russians were being marinated themselves One of the germans, Biolek, was actually Caught putting, uh Remoulade down his shorts and the Finns Were using tomato-flavoured running shoes i Think it should either Be unrestricted garnishing Or a simple Olympic-standard mayonnaise) Gavin, does it ever worry you That you're actually going To be chewed up by a bloody great crocodile? (The only thing that worries me, Jim Is being being the first One down that gullet) Well, the way things are Going here at Loughborough It looks as though Britain Could easily pick up A place in the first seven hundred But nothing's predictable in this tough Harsh, highly competitive world Where today's champion Is tomorrow's crocodile shit and back To you, in the studio, norman!
Watch: New Singing Lesson Videos Can Make Anyone A Great Singer
Written by: GRAHAM CHAPMAN, JOHN CLEESE, TERRY GILLIAM, ERIC IDLE, TERRY JONES, MICHAEL EDWARD PALIN
Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, Warner Chappell Music, Inc.
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"Crocodile Lyrics." Lyrics.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Apr. 2024. <https://www.lyrics.com/lyric-lf/10763486/Monty+Python/Crocodile>.
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