I'm a Fuckin Wizard

MC ChrisMC Chris 

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MC Chris

Christopher Brendan Ward, better known by his stage name, MC Chris (stylized as mc chris) is an American rapper, voice actor, writer, and improvisational comedian. more »

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Well my name is mc chris
I kick microphone spit
Not on the stage I'm a mage
I amaze with my mit's
With my digit's there's no limit's
Cast incantations and spells
Warlocks and wizards feel blizzards or
Face the fires of hell
I come correct protect the party
With a field of force
Whether it's journeys or tourneys I
Curse kings and courts
So put down your missiles
And your pistol precursors
I'm a mercenary adversary I'm
A sorcerer surfer
All usurpers are my supper I
Make them suffer setbacks
So you better get back I'll put
A jinx on your jet pack
I'm an arcane pain some
Say my sanity's waning
My presence is unpleasant I'll give
Your essence a draining
I'm not complaining but im gaining
Better pick up the pace
I warcraft for laughs put my
Staff in your face
You want proof I'll say sooths
Over amulets and talismans
I'll bewitch your battle plans just
Pass me the chalice man
I'm a fucking wizard I will f*ck up your shit
Put the mage on every page and
You just wrote up a hit
I'm a graph paper god when
I'm loungin' I'm lit
Better check your behavior I'm
The savior favorite
I'm a fucking wizard don't make
Me wiggle my fingers
I will leave you with a lesson
When your questin that lingers
So don't make me wrinkle my
Nose or twinkle my toes
Yes I'm surrounded by sparkles
But I will f*ck up all foes - I'm a wizard

I'm an oracle of omens I
Tell fortunes read palms
I'm the necromancer with answers carry
On and stay calm my origin's opaque I never
Escaped a broken home
But I take place in Martin
Manuscripts and distant Tolkien tomes
I'm an angel with an angle and
I advise you not to tangle
I'll leave you bruised and mangled
With shackles on your ankles
I will not yield I have shields
I will repel every attempt
Every object you project I
Will reject and resend
I'll put a hex upon your
Horde I'll science your alliance
I'll trounce your troop and graze you group
If you stoop and show defiance
Not venereal but ethereal I
Will voyage then vanquish
An antagonistic mystic that leaves
Thieves in anguish
Whether it's a warrior of merit
Or a druid or cleric
I will clean up with my team
Up that is simply homeric
No matter what the mission
All adventures are elementary
Less your lethal I'll call eagles
Been my sentries for centuries

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