Song parody of
William's Doll
by Marlo Thomas
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When my friend William was five years old
He wanted a doll, to hug and hold
"A doll," said William, "is what I need
To wash and clean, and dress and feed
"A Doll to give a bottle to
And put to bed when day is through
And any time my doll gets ill
I'll take good care of it," said my friend Bill
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
Don't be a sissy said his best friend Ed
Why should a boy want to play with a doll
Dolls are for girls said his cousin Fred
Don't be a jerk, said his older brother
"I know what to do," said his father to his mother
So his father bought him a basketball
A badminton set, and that's not all
A bag of marbles, a baseball glove
And all the things a boy would love
And Bill was good at every game
Enjoyed them all, but all the same
When Billy's father praised his skill
"Can I please have a doll now," said my friend Bill
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
Then William's grandma arrived one day
And wanted to know what he liked to play
And Bill said, "Baseball's my favorite game
I like to play, but all the same
"I'd give my bat and ball and glove
To have a doll that I could love"
"How very wise," his grandma said
Said Bill, "but everyone says this instead"
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
So William's grandma, as I've been told
Bought William a doll, to hug and hold
And William's father began to frown
But grandma smiled, and calmed him down
Explaining, William wants a doll
So when he has a baby someday
He'll know how to dress it, put diapers on double
And gently caress it to bring up a bubble
And care for his baby as every good father
Should learn to do
William has a doll, William has a doll
'Cause someday he is gonna be a father, too
When my friend William was five years old
He wanted a doll, to hug and hold
"A doll," said William, "is what I need
To wash and clean, and dress and feed
"A Doll to give a bottle to
And put to bed when day is through
And any time my doll gets ill
I'll take good care of it," said my friend Bill
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
Don't be a sissy said his best friend Ed
Why should a boy want to play with a doll
Dolls are for girls said his cousin Fred
Don't be a jerk, said his older brother
"I know what to do," said his father to his mother
So his father bought him a basketball
A badminton set, and that's not all
A bag of marbles, a baseball glove
And all the things a boy would love
And Bill was good at every game
Enjoyed them all, but all the same
When Billy's father praised his skill
"Can I please have a doll now," said my friend Bill
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
Then William's grandma arrived one day
And wanted to know what he liked to play
And Bill said, "Baseball's my favorite game
I like to play, but all the same
"I'd give my bat and ball and glove
To have a doll that I could love"
"How very wise," his grandma said
Said Bill, "but everyone says this instead"
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
A doll, a doll, William wants a doll
So William's grandma, as I've been told
Bought William a doll, to hug and hold
And William's father began to frown
But grandma smiled, and calmed him down
Explaining, William wants a doll
So when he has a baby someday
He'll know how to dress it, put diapers on double
And gently caress it to bring up a bubble
And care for his baby as every good father
Should learn to do
William has a doll, William has a doll
'Cause someday he is gonna be a father, too