Sumhin Fir the Weekend Chief

Weel good mornin chief We huvnae seen ye in here fir a while An' whit would sir be astin fir the day A neckline or a crew Or maybe sumhin new A Beatles or a Tony Ur ye tangerine or blue We kin cure that scalp infliction Wi a nifty bit o' friction Tae revitalize the heid fae tired skin Eh love thon Lizbeth Taylor Must've broken many hearts But the question abdie wants tae ken Eh wonder if she farts The nicht ehm doon tae Bissels Fir the dominoes an darts Sumthin fir the weekend Sumthin fir the weekend Sumthin fir the weekend, Chief Did ye hear aboot the murder They've got somedie in the jail Meh missus boucht new curtains In the Draffen's sale Thon's an awfy stooshie Boot that common merket thing We dug them oot in twa world waars Noo they'll no let us in Meh sister aye gets pregnant Efter drinkin too much gin Sumhin fir the weekend Sumhin fir the weekend Sumhin fir the weekend, Chief Oh a good couffoure Kin taka boot an oor A perm can mebbe tak a whilie langer We hud a bloke in here Wha hud a thatch fae ear tae ear He wis back oot on the street His erse had barely touched the seat That's an awfy thing in Cuba Meh brither plays the tuba The Russians hiv a monkey up in space How diz it dae it's business Must be fed up tae the teeth Floatin roon the cosmos In a capsule fuu o' keech It's because o' a' they rockets That the weather's gettin dreech Sumthin fir the weekend Sumthin fir the weekend Sumthin fir the weekend Sumthin fir the weekend Sumthin fir the weekend, Chief