He's Nae Wehz

He's the strangest lad eh'v ivvur met An eh've met some weird gehz Oh he's nae wehz Naw he's nae wehz Love's tae gie it laldy In he's fantoosh kipper tehz But he's nae wehz Naw he's nae wehz He's goin tae be a bricky At the Kingsway Techy College The nicht he's up the Gussie Perk Fur carnival knowledge Nae wonder fowk are sceptical Amongst he's many claims Like he inventit fritters An' thon stuff fir cleanin drains Gie him he's due That laddie trehs Hoo he passed 11 plus Weel abdies mystifehd Ye dinnae hav tae jine the dots Tae win a major prehz Cos he's nae wehz Naw he's nae wehz Come the Dundee fortnight He's aff tae warmer climes Wi fehv woodbine Wi fehv woodbine Drinkin crème de menthol An aye chasin efter quines Dressed tae the 9's Dressed tae the 9's He aways taks his lilo Tae exotical locations Last year it wis Friokheim Veha Invergowrie Station Doon the JM Ballroom He's a playboy in disgehz Oh he's nae wehz Naw he's nae wehz Gie him he's due That laddie trehs Hoo he passed 11 plus Weel abdies mystifehd Ye dinnae hav tae jine the dots Tae win a major prehz Cos he's nae wehz Naw he's nae wehz He's got a Ford Cortina Wi a heated windscreen washer The back o' fev Oot fir a drev Heidrests an a consol Noo he's trehn tae grow a tasher It's no arrehvd It's no arrehvd His faethur he jist rolls he's ees An prays fir bonny skehs His mither she jist shacks hur heid Denies the femly tehs But seein ehm he's brither Eh've tae pit up wi the lehs Cos he's nae wehz Naw he's no wehz Gie him he's due That laddie trehs Hoo he past he's drehvin test Weel abdies mystifehd Ye dinnae hav tae jine the dots Tae win a major prehz Cos he's nae wehz Naw he's nae wehz