Bizarre Christmas Incident
Ben Folds
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(Ho ho ho!) Hey grandpa, let's tell them the little story about this Christmas (Yeah tell 'em, tell 'em about Christmas!) Christmas Eve, I didn't get much sleep I kept hearing things Heavy breathing from the chimney, who could it be? (I know who it was) (What happened then, Ben?) (Yeah, what happened?) I went back to sleep (Back to sleep? Shit!) I'm tired if I don't have sleep And in the morn' I couldn't believe my eyes A whale of a corpse With a long white beard was hangin' over the fire Oh, Santa's he's a big fat f*ck Went down the chimney got his fat ass suck Oh honey call the lawyers fast 'Cause Mrs. Claus is gonna sue my ass Hey hey hey (hey!) yeah (Ohh, oh oh) Ok grandpa, step up Sing in this thing right here Tell them what you saw, tell them what you saw grandpa I gotta tell you folks He wasn't wearin' no clothes (no clothes!) He must have rubbed the whole gallon of Crisco off From his back and down to his toes Well, I was talking to the cops outside The dog was lickin' Crisco off of his thighs They hauled him away in a double wide What a sad, sad way to die, hey hey hey! Santa's he's a big fat f*ck Went down the chimney got his fat ass stuck Oh honey call the lawyers fast Mrs. Claus is gonna sue our ass
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Written by: BEN FOLDS, BENJAMIN SCOTT FOLDS
Lyrics © BMG Rights Management
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
8 facts about this song
Album Creation"Bizarre Christmas Incident" is a song by Ben Folds, an American singer-songwriter. It was first released in late 2001 as part of his album 'Fear of Pop' under the pseudonym 'Fear of Pop.'
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Christmas ThemeAs the name suggests, this song is a Christmas-themed song. However, it provides a humorous, unconventional outlook on Christmas rather than traditional sentiments associated with the holiday.
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Explicit ContentThough it's a Christmas song, "Bizarre Christmas Incident" is marked with explicit content, setting itself apart from most Christmas songs known for their innocent, jolly nature.
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Unique PresentationThe song doesn't shy away from its ludicrous narrative about Santa getting stuck in a chimney and being discovered in a compromising situation, which is a unique story in terms of Christmas narratives.
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Different Genre"Bizarre Christmas Incident" fits the alternative rock genre with a comedic angle, differing from the usual pop or carol form of most Christmas songs.
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Minimal AirplayDue to its explicit contents and irreverent spirit, "Bizarre Christmas Incident" does not receive as much airplay during the Christmas season as traditional songs.
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Ben Fold’s PersonaAs with most of his other songs, Ben Fold's lyrics in "Bizarre Christmas Incident" are characteristically witty, showing his tendency to push boundaries and break norms.
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Humorous ToneDespite the initially graphic and potentially distressing nature of the lyrics, the song maintains a light, humorous tone, consistent with other works by Ben Folds.
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Citation
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"Bizarre Christmas Incident Lyrics." Lyrics.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Mar. 2024. <https://www.lyrics.com/lyric/35049521/Ben+Folds/Bizarre+Christmas+Incident>.
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