Bald

The Darkness

About Bald

"Bald" is a song by the English rock band The Darkness.


Year:
2005
5:32
24 

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It would appear that male pattern
Baldness has set in
His hair, at an alarming pace
Running away from his face
He's losing his virility
And now his masculinity
Has been compromised
And his libido down-sized

Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me you understand

Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God it's him instead of me.

From what I have been reading
His scalp needs kneading
To stimulate each follicle
And reverse this diabolical
Condition that's afflicted he
For years and has cruelly
Repulsed each potential mate
And left him with a balding pate

Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me you understand

Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God it's him instead of me.

Sock it to me baby, yeah!

Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me you understand

Not for me, not for me, not for me, uh-uh
Not for me, not for me, heaven forbid
It's not for me you understand

Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God it's him instead of me.
Thank God!

Bald, slap headed and hairless
Bald he is destined to be
Bald, well tonight thank God it's him instead of me.
How?

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The Darkness

The Darkness are a British glam rock band from Lowestoft, Suffolk, formed in 2000. The band consists of Justin Hawkins (lead vocals, guitar), his brother Dan Hawkins (guitar, backing vocals), Frankie Poullain (bass, backing vocals) and Ed Graham (drums) and are characterised by their classic rock influences and elaborate stage performances. more »

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Written by: DANIEL FRANCIS HAWKINS, EDWIN JAMES GRAHAM, FRANCIS GILLES POULLAIN-PATTERSON, JUSTIN DAVID HAWKINS

Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, Kobalt Music Publishing Ltd.

Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind


10 facts about this song

Band
"Bald" is a song by the British rock band, The Darkness. This band is known for its high-energy rock music that often combines elements of hard rock and glam rock.
Album
The song is from the band's fourth studio album, "Last of Our Kind," which was released on 27 February 2015.
Songwriting
The song was reportedly written and composed by the band members themselves, showing their versatility as musicians.
Lyrics
The lyrics of "Bald" are filled with the band's characteristic humor and sarcasm, featuring lines like "I used to have hair but now I'm bald".
Song Theme
The theme of "Bald" is a self-deprecating and funny take on male-pattern baldness and aging. It serves up the topic with a helping of British wit and humor.
Promotion
While it was not released as a single, "Bald" garnered attention in live performances for its catchy rhythm and the band's theatrical performance style.
Negative Reviews
The song has garnered some criticism for its seemingly trivial subject matter. Some critics feel that it speaks to a lack of depth or maturity in the band's songwriting.
Musicians
The musicians who performed "Bald" are Justin Hawkins (lead vocals, guitars), Dan Hawkins (guitars), Frankie Poullain (bass), and Rufus Tiger Taylor (drums).
Bold Topic
Despite criticisms, others have praised "Bald" for its unique topic, praising The Darkness for their bravery in tackling a subject that is often avoided in rock music.
Lingering Popularity
Despite not being one of The Darkness's most recognized songs, "Bald" continues to have a dedicated fanbase. As of 2021, it is still regularly performed at their concerts.

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