The Bride Stripped Bare (By the Bachelors)

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The Bonzo Dog Band

The Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band (also known as the Bonzo Dog Band or the Bonzos) was created by a group of British art-school students in the 1960s. Combining elements of music hall, trad jazz and psychedelia with surreal humour and avant-garde art, the Bonzos came to public attention through appearances in the Beatles' 1967 film Magical Mystery Tour and the 1968 ITV comedy show Do Not Adjust Your Set. more »

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So the boys got together and formed a band...uh, fate played the 
Straight man, and since then they've never looked back... 
You, lads, welcome to t'Club be	, I've seen you on t'telly with your long 
Hair and pimples. (pop pop) 
We arrived at the gig looking rough 
Not happy, we'd all had enough 
Of eight hours on the road (honk!) 
Legs Larry said, eeh, "It's the boozer for me, dear boy." 
Yup, yup, yes indeedy 
And the hotel reception was empty and cold 
With horrid red wallpaper forty years old 
It stank like a rhino house! 
Mr. Slater said, "Pooh, I can smell Vindaloo." 
"Oh, really?" "No, Sir, O'Reilly!" 
Hobnob
And we wave to the people who frown 
At our hair as we ride into town 
And Chalky and Nozz had set up the gear 
At the club where the "Dohl Pal Show" would appear 
In person as themselves (oarf! oarf!) 
In person as themselves 
"Then Neil, Fred, and I played darts for awhile." 
"Before we switched on our theatrical smiles!" 
"Hey, you remember!" 
Hot dogs on sale in the foyer
Hey... 
You can have a drink in your dressing rooms, lads, but you can't come 
Into club looking like that. We can't oblige. Thank you.
Hey, Redneck! 
We've had 'em all here, you know, Tommy Ray. 
Oh, aye? 
That's a brand new scratch on the piano, cost you seventy-five quid to put that 
Right. 
Whoa, who did that? 
Aye, remember Frank Fesher
And and Buddy Greece! 
Aye! 
Put off thought really, here, doesn't it? 
Whoa, what? 
Will you take your empty glasses back the bar? 
Any artiste mentioning football will be paid off immediately. 
Hoover
It's not for meself, lads, it's for me daughter. 
Five pints of lager, and one Coke! 
It's not me, lads, it's the manager what makes the rules.

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