A Real Good Time

Jim StaffordJim Stafford 

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Jim Stafford

James Wayne "Jim" Stafford (born January 16, 1944, Eloise, Florida) is an American comedian, musician, and singer-songwriter. While prominent in the 1970s for his records "Spiders and Snakes", "Swamp Witch", and "My Girl Bill", Stafford has headlined at his own theater in Branson, Missouri since 1990. Stafford is self-taught on guitar, fiddle, piano, banjo, organ and harmonica. more »

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I'd just got into town I didn't have nothing to do
When I happened upon this telephone booth
With a whole bunch of writing covering one entire wall
It said if you ain't afraid to spend a dime 
And if you wanna have a real good time
Just give Lucille a call
Now underneath her number was this big long list said she'd do that
Said she'd do this
I let my fingers do the walking through all kinds of stuff I'd missed
Well, I shuffled through my pockets till I found myself a dime
I heard a ring or two and I got her on the line
And I said Lucille, I'd like to have a real good time

I mighta found a lover I mighta made a new friend
Well, I ain't had a real good time since I don't know when
Don't know when

She said well who are you and what is this
And I said it's Jim, Lucille, and it's about this list
Which I began to read with particular emphasis on my favorite numbers
1, 5, 11, 14, 22, 33, and 41 through 59
She said where are you and I gave her the street
She said you sound like a guy I'd love to meet
She said stay right where you are and I promise you a real good time

Mighta found a lover
Mighta made a new friend
Well I ain't had a real good time since I don't know when
'Bout 15 minutes after my arrest
In the middle of the questions I tried to protest
That I wasn't that phantom obscene phone caller master of crime

Before they took me away they allowed me one call
And I recalled that number on the phone booth wall
I said, Lucille, me and you got a altogether different idea about a real good time

I lost my lover
I lost my new friend
Well, you can't have a real good time
Doing 1 to 10
Hello, Lucille
Lookie here honey, I'm gonna be tied up here for quite awhile
And I was wondering in oh maybe about ten years or so
When I get out of here if you'd mind if I gave you a call
Hello? Hello? Lucille! Lucille! Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?

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