Nothin' Fits, Nothin' Works, & Everything Hurts

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Caleb Bailey & The Bottom Dollars

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Sittin' idly by, goin' nowhere in a hurry
She's got a new man and I heard he was a furry
Looks like old Elmo he took my big bird from me

A bottle of whiskey and a Hot n Ready
Ol' Jim Beam and me we been goin' steady
Steady like tryin' to ride a bike with no front tire

Well, the dryin' machine drawed up my britches
I'd unwad my panties but my thumb's got stitches
From tryin' to sew some strings of luck together
But nothin' fits, nothin' works, and everything hurts

Started hangin' downtown in the nooks and crannies
I ain't talkin' bout your neighborhood hootenanny
Smoke filled bars where crooks sell blow for handjobs

I bout broke my damn back reachin' for the bottom shelf
Only a fool would do this to himself
But that's all right, I got a cold pack for my back

Well, the dryin' machine drawed up my britches
I'd unwad my panties but my thumb's got stitches
From tryin' to sew some strings of luck together
But nothin' fits, nothin' works, and everything hurts

I gotta 20-inch TV and a pair of jeans
But I ain't as broke as I may seem
I gotta fridge full of beer and a drinkin' buddy in the mirror

I'm gonna knock these down and set em back up
Been walkin' the floor over you since we broke up
Gonna need a new pair of boots by the time I'm through

Well, the dryin' machine drawed up my britches
I'd unwad my panties but my thumb's got stitches
From tryin' to sew some strings of luck together
But nothin' fits, nothin' works, and everything hurts

 The easy, fast & fun way to learn how to sing: 30DaySinger.com