Grandpa's Missing

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Ralph Keefer

3:12

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Searching through the basement looking for his tools
Locked in the cupboard, playing the fool
Old Grandpa he's a half-a-load beyond cool
Making his lunch with the stereo on
Cooks chicken wings and  frozen prawns
Heads out the door - but leaves the oven on
And now Grandpa's missing, Grandpa's missing
Grandpa's missing and we don't know where he's gone!

Old Grandpa he's a mighty fine man
Plays the piano till the sun goes down
Heads up the stairs - now where's the bathroom gone?
Out in the yard, he's working on his truck
He's covered in grease, he's covered in muck
Can't find the oil pan, the boy's shit out of luck
Yup, Grandpa's missing, Grandpa's missing
Grandpa's missing and we don't know where he's gone!

He's been gone all night and we're starting to freak
He even left his harp under the seat
We're worried sick and we don't know what to do!
We called the doctor, we called the cops
We checked the restaurants, we checked the docks
We know he told Grandma... but now she's forgot
And Grandpa's missing, yeah, Grandpa's still missing
Grandpa's missing and we don't know where he's gone!

Well it turns out he had nothin' to do
So he wandered down the road for a beer or two
With a few of his friends them bein' Grampas too
They played a few games of shuffleboard
Bitched about how they're always ignored
Smoked cigarettes - and sang the blues
Grandpa ain't missing, no Grandpa ain't missing
Grandpa ain't missing, we know where he has gone
Grandpa ain't missing, he's just out pissing it up at the Legion
Grandpa ain't missing, we know where he has gone
Grandpa ain't missing, we know exactly where he's gone

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