Harper Valley PTA
I want to tell you all the story 'bout The Harper Valley widow wife Who had a teenage daughter Who attended Harper Valley Junior High Well, her daughter came home one afternoon And didn't even stop to play She said, "Mama, I got a note here From the Harper Valley P.T.A." The note said, "Mrs. Johnson you're a wearing Your dresses way too high, it's reported you've been Drinking and a running 'round with men and goin' wild We don't believe you ought to be a bringing up your little girl this way It was signed by the secretary Harper Valley P.T.A." Well, it happened that the P.T.A. Was gonna meet that very afternoon They were sure surprised when Mrs. Johnson Wore her miniskirt into the room She walked up to the blackboard And I recall the things she had to say She said, "I'd like to address This meeting of the Harper Valley P.T.A." Now there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there And seven times he asked me for a date And Mrs. Taylor sure seems to use A lotta ice whenever he's away And Mr. Baker, can you tell us Why your secretary had to leave this town And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep Her window shades all pulled completely down? Well, Mr. Harper couldn't make it 'Cause he stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath You'll find she's had a little nip of gin When you have the nerve to tell me That you think that as a mother I'm not fit Well, this is just a little Payton Place And you're all Harper Valley hypocrites No I wouldn't put you on because It really did it happened just this way? The day my mama socket it to the Harper Valley P.T.A. The day my mama socket it to the Harper Valley P.T.A.