270 Somethin'

Cledus T. JuddCledus T. Judd 

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Cledus T. Judd

Barry Poole (born December 18, 1964, in Cartersville, Georgia) is an American country music artist who records under the name Cledus T. Judd. Known primarily for his parodies of popular country music songs, he has been called the "Weird Al" Yankovic of country music, and his albums are usually an equal mix of original comedy songs and parodies. Judd has released nine studio albums and two EPs, and several of their singles have entered the Billboard Hot Country Songs charts. His highest chart peak is the No. 48 "I Love NASCAR", a parody of Toby Keith's 2003 single "I Love This Bar”. Poole graduated from Cass High School in Cartersville, Georgia in 1982. more »

Year:

2003

3:28

151 Views

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Track 4 "270 Somethin'"
Parody of Mark Wills' "19 Somethin'" by Mark Wills
Enjoy

Woo
You know a man does have to eat him somethin'

I love candy bars...eat them all the time
My combo meal's are super-sized
And I crave the stuff they put inside those dang ding dongs
Mmm

My cholesterol is off the chart
I keep a blood pressure cuff on my left arm
Doctor says that my poor heart won't last too long
My nickname in school was double wide
Cause my momma fried

Now I weigh 270 somethin'
Always huffin and puffin
Lay around the house all day
No wonder I can't lose no weight
See that pizza on the TV
Oh man don't it look cheesy
You know they deliver here for nothin'
That's why I weigh 270 somethin'

My insurance said that they'd co-pay
I made the same appointment Carnie Wilson made
Plastic surgeon said he had a way to get those love handles off
He stapled and sucked stuff through a tube
I lost a hundred pounds in one afternoon
When I came to in the recovery room
Wouldn't much left of me
When he removed the bandages from my thighs
I couldn't believe my eyes

Now I weigh 180 somethin'
Didn't have to do much of nothin'
I'm lookin' like Jean Claude Van Damme
To fit in a pair Mark Wills' pants
Now everyone who sees me
Can't believe that I'm so skinny
My body fat is nearly nothin'
Ha ha
Now that I weigh 180 somethin'

Ha Ha

Now I date a model with a GED
But do you think she'd be with me
I wonder (I wonder)
If I (If I)

Still weighed 270 somethin'
Stuffin down blueberry muffins
Onion rings and cans of SPAM
That's how I got so fat
Now everyone who sees me
Can't believe that I'm so skinny
I used to break a sweat just doin' nothin'
Back when I weighed 270 somethin'

Now I weigh 180 somethin'

Ah, well it's probably like more like around 225-26
None of y'all's business how much I weigh
Huh huh

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